Want to buy a "vaccination passport"? You've come to the right place.

Everyone is talking about "vaccination passports" and how you'll need them to go anywhere.

We've got you covered.

Buy Now!

Tell them where to "stick it".

Buy Now!

"Identify" as being vaccinated today and let's save America!

We've got your family covered!

Kids need it to play sports? Dad needs it to fly for business? Grandma needs it to shut up her friends? Uncle Joe needs it to sniff people's hair? We've got your whole family covered. Buy their "passports" today!

Buy now!

Let's open America back up!

Sick of being told small businesses are super spreaders but big box stores are safe? That church is dangerous but liquor stores aren't? That the 'rona won't bite if you're eating at a restaurant? Get your "passport!"

Buy now!

Time to end the confusion!

Confused on how you'll get the 'rona walking the wrong way down a grocery store aisle? Wondering where the flu went? Not sure where common sense and logic went? The "passport" makes the problems disappear.

Buy now!

Legal Disclaimer

This is not meant to be passed off as a real passport.

It won't get you anywhere except maybe inside of patriotic businesses. And the homes of cool Americans who like bacon and bourbon and puppies and guns.

This is not meant to actually try and misrepresent yourself as having been vaccinated for COVID-19. Let's not be confused with those people. They are the people who wear masks alone in their Prius and wear condoms alone in bed at night.

This is a passport for those of us who "identify" as being vaccinated. For those of us who are sick and tired of being told what to do with our bodies. And for the growing number of Americans who are just... done.

Buy Your "Passport" Now!

Buy Your "Passports" Today!

  • Vaccination "Passport" Book
    Regular price
    $25.00
    Sale price
    $25.00
    Regular price
    Unit price
    per 
    Sold out
  • Customized Vaccination "Passport" Card
    Regular price
    $15.00
    Sale price
    $15.00
    Regular price
    Unit price
    per 
    Sold out

Refund Policy

No, we don't do refunds. Under any circumstance. For any reason.
Period. Why?

Because outside of all of the obvious expenses associated with getting you a custom "passport", we're immediately reinvesting profits.

Into what, you ask?

Into getting American things like guns and ammo. And flying across the country to shake the hands (gasp!) of fellow patriotic Americans.

So no - we're not giving you your money back... no matter how many times your mom emails us and asks. Sorry.

Just kidding. We're not sorry.

Buy your "passport" now!